There were specific reasons that I chose the the house we live in now. First, we were in a rush to find something that would work, it was in an area that I had become familiar, it was closer to Kate's school, etc. The home itself is simple, not something we would have built...but it was workable.
First, and in a former life, had I built this house and sold it, we would have been sued to high heaven. We have poured a lot of work into this place, as it needed some tender loving care and understanding. Battling erosion the old fashioned way, I sent Bill and Michelle to Brantley Hill Road to dig monkey grass clumps from his mother's beds. It is evident by her overgrown and untended beds that she had a green thumb as well.
There are just some places in our yard that are not conducive to sod, so I decided that the monkey grass should do the trick. I have also learned the art of "starts" from somewhere else rather than purchasing everything that is planted. We have a little of a whole lot of people in our yard. Figs and roses from Gran, succulents from Aunt Kay and Unk, hydrangeas from P.S. Edwards, day lilies from Pelham, and now monkey grass from Nanny.
Upon their arrival, I laid out a plan for Bill to dig small holes about 8" apart down a small rock retaining wall. He couldn't do it.
First, it is important to understand that it has become a full time job to keep him active. One of the main reasons he is still as cognizant today is that we try and keep him up and running. Otherwise, he is in his chair watching TV all day (pacing to visit me in the office while studying in 30 minute intervals - giving me just enough time to get into something before getting me completely off track to ask me what day it is). Additionally, a little activity goes a long way with him as he tires easily. A little bit of activity also keeps the medication down at bedtime. If he's tired, he'll sleep well,. Otherwise I have doctors' orders to use those meds. We want him to sleep soundly and not wander, ever.
I am currently studying for certification(s), however I had to change into yard working attire and go outside with he and Michelle to guide them along which ended up in me participating in the planting of half the job. That took about an hour of time I desperately wanted, as the plan was to keep them outdoors for the rest of the afternoon. It them took them several hours to finish the other half.
I can get away with instructing him, Kate can some days, Wade can ~ but not Michelle.
For those interested in the affects of EOAD, this patient is often strong enough to manually handle the task at the age of 64 and unable to determine how to dig small holes 8" apart. Reasoning skills are are pretty much shot.
Then, I devised a method of taking the separated grass and laying it out 8" apart on the ground as a guide, only to find out that he was cutting into the grass roots and ruining them and, he would not dig on further staying ahead of me. In the end, I just marked the spot, he dug the hole (sometimes right, sometimes not), waiting for me to set the grass plug and cover, then I would mark another. While reminding him each time to not send the dirt clump sailing across the lawn.
He slept soundly Monday night, complaining some of an aching back.
Kate and I left him still in bed at 7:00 am on a trek to school. We had gone over with him several times the night before and prior to leaving what the schedule was. School for her, school for me, dance rehearsals for her, Dance Partners Meeting for me, home by 7:30 p.m. Michelle would be with him until she left for work at about 4:30 p.m. leaving him alone for no more than 3 hours.
We arrived back at the house at 7:18 sharp. It was evident that he had been sitting in the garage in his chair waiting on us. Up the stairs to the bedroom I go and his first question was, "Where have you been all day?"
We settled in to watch American Idol together and I asked him if he was hungry and he couldn't tell me. I asked what he had for lunch and he couldn't tell me. He finally admitted that he'd had nothing which we know if absolutely not the facts. After about 30 minutes of wrangling around about what to eat, I presented him a warm up plate of our Easter dinner. He must of been hungry after all, he ate the entire thing.
During dinner, he complained that it had been a lonesome day for him because we had left him all by himself. I reminded him that Michelle had been with him all day until 4:30.
He kissed Kate and I on the top of the head before turning in as he normally does with an apology.
"I'm sorry, Honey", he says.
"For what", I ask.
"For being like I am".
When Michelle came in I asked her what he'd eaten for lunch. She said all she could get him interested in was ice cream, so that's what he had. She also said he complained of not feeling good and wanted to nap on and off most of the day.
And this morning, he doesn't remember a thing.
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